Muppet Retro Reviews: Muppet Classic Theater

Kyle Mahoney - Muppet Classic Theater was a straight to VHS feature-length production released in 1994. In a similar vein to the previously released film The Muppet Christmas Carol, the Muppets are retelling classic stories. It takes place in the Muppet Theater where Gonzo and Rizzo once again become the narrators as the rest of the gang act the story on stage.

The six stories told are The Three Little Pigs, The Midas Touch, The Boy Who Cried Wolf, (followed by a brief intermission) then Rumpelstilskin, The Emperor’s New Clothes, and The Elves and the Shoemaker. This production was significant in that it was one of Bill Barretta’s first Muppet productions. This also was the debut of some Muppets Tonight faces: Andy Pig, Randy Pig, and the Elvises.

Kermit, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, Rizzo, Fozzie, and even Robin the Frog each take the stage, some in several roles, bringing their own flair and classic breaking the fourth wall into these timeless tales. Each story featured one original song by Philip Balsam, Dennis Lee (both of Fraggle Rock fame), Mark Radice, and Michael and Patricia Silversher.

Some of the best moments of the video include Miss Piggy sending the Big Bad Wolf into orbit via fireworks, Gonzo (as a Satyr) taking a nap in King Kermit’s rose bush, and Norman the Ox thwarting another wolf. Other hilarious moments are Piggy finding out Rumplestiltskin's name by looking at the name his mother had sewn into his clothes, Robin revealing that Emperor Fozzie was scammed and is in his underpants, and lastly the Elvis Elves receiving Sequin Jumpsuits as thanks.

One of the writers, Jim Lewis, had this to say about the project:

"My personal favorite among my own projects is Muppet Classic Theater which I co-wrote with Bill Prady. It was done relatively soon after Jim's passing, and it was in many ways a re-gathering of the clan. It was fun. Plus it's just silly, with no great message. I'm fond of it and hope it sees the light of DVD someday."

Although Muppet Classic Theater has only been released on VHS, you can watch it all right HERE with this link to Part 1.

All in all Muppet Classic Theater is an absolute delight. The songs are catchy and the script is fantastic in giving the Muppets their classic humor while also giving respect to the original stories.

The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, muppetmindset@gmail.com

Weekly Muppet Wednesdays: Fleet Scribbler

Today's article was written by Mike Baldasare with edits by Ryan Dosier.

FLEET SCRIBBLER

Performed by...

Jerry Nelson

First appearance...

The Muppet Show Episode 204: Rich Little (1977)

Most recent appearance...

(On-Screen) The Muppet Movie (1979)

Muppet Robin Hood #4 Comic Book (2009)

Best known role...

Gossip journalist for "The Daily Scandal"

WHO IS FLEET SCRIBBLER?

Fleet Scribbler is a very aggressive reporter for the so-called "gossip rag" The Daily Scandal. He sometimes proves to be a major annoyance to Kermit when he stops by to report on The Muppet Show. Fleet first appeared in The Muppet Show Episode 204, guest starring Rich Little. In this episode, Fleet was one of the reporters who interviewed Rich Little by the stage door.

Fleet made his only major appearance in Episode 210 guest starring George Burns, where he blackmailed his way around The Muppet Show, hassling Kermit and cavorting with Miss Piggy. Fleet Scribbler was such a dedicated and prepared reporter that he could even speak fluently to The Swedish Chef. This unreasonable reporter gave Kermit a negative headline about snooping flies and also gave Gonzo a possible headline "Gonzo Fiddles While George Burns."

Fleet's final times on The Muppet Show came in Season 3, when Kermit spoke to him on the phone in Episode 304 and in Episode 311 where he was one of the dancers who stole Fozzie's jokes during "At the Dance." Fleet's last on-screen appearance was in The Muppet Movie finale. His most recent appearance in any medium was a cameo in the fourth issue of BOOM! Studio's Muppet Robin Hood comic book.

WHY DO THE MUPPETS NEED FLEET SCRIBBLER?

Fleet Scribbler has not appeared since 1979, and with reasons for why not coming all the way from the top. Head writer Jerry Juhl noted how "abrasive and awful" the character was to write for. Really, the Muppets don't need a character like Fleet Scribbler, but bringing in a goofy, unforgiving reporter type every once in awhile could provide a laugh... but we probably won't be seeing that anytime soon.

The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, muppetmindset@gmail.com

Ten Favorite Waiter Grover Segments

Michael Wermuth, Jr. - Today I'm going to write about my top ten favorite "Waiter Grover" segments. Hopefully your favorites will be on the menu -- err, I mean list. 

10.   Outdoor Restaurant 

Mr. Johnson goes to Charlie's outdoor restaurant on a very windy day, where the wind blows the customer's food away. Unfortunately, it doesn't blow the bill away (and apparently he has to pay even though he didn't get to eat his food).

9.   Picture Menu 

An early segment from before Mr. Johnson would be as grumpy as he would be known for.  Mr. Johnson orders a sandwich exactly like the one pictured on the menu, making Grover go back until it is exactly like the one pictured. And when it's finally as it should be, Mr. Johnson's lunch hour is over. Interestingly, he does not get mad that he missed lunch, and doesn't even get a to-go box. He just calmly gets up as if missing lunch wasn't a big deal. 

8.   Singing and Dancing Waiter

 Grover works at a Spanish restaurant, where he is required to sing and dance as he serves the food. However, whenever he sings and dances, he ends up spilling the food. One funny thing is when Mr. Johnson suggests he sit the food down before dancing, Grover sits the food onto the floor as opposed to the table. 

7.   Bawk-bawk Sandwich 

One of the few segments where Grover's restaurant customer is not Mr. Johnson, but the similar-looking Simon Soundman (who at one point implies that they are brothers). Simon asks for a chicken sandwich, but due to the way he talks, he makes the chicken sound instead of saying "Chicken sandwich," leading Grover to bring in different kidns of sandwiches, including an elephant sandwich (which is just a toy elephant), a guitar sandwich, and a telephone sandwich. The fact that the restaurant would actually serve guitar and telephone sandwiches is funny. 

6.   First, Next, and Last

Mr. Johnson orders coffee, soup, and pie, and wants them all in the same order. Grover keeps getting the order mixed up, until Mr. Johnson says he wants everything else before the pie, causing Grover to actually bring everything else on the menu to the table at once. Of course Grover could have just brought all of his customers orders at once and Johnson could have eaten in the order he wanted. 

5.   Waiter Memory

Mr. Johnson orders a cheeseburger and french fries, but instead of writing it down, Grover has his own method for remembering: Make a poem out of his customers orders. With the rhyme "Round and tasty on a bun/pickles, french fries/yum, yum, yum!" Grover brings his customer a grapefruit on bread. It is then time for the waiter's lunch break, and for some reason Grover gets the idea to order a hamburger and fries. 

4.   Spaghetti 

Grover works at an Italian restaurant, where Mr. Johnson orders spaghetti. Unfortunately, Grover only brings out one piece, then two, then one again, before bringing in too much, spilling it on his customer. This segment is really funny, I like the set used for this restaurant, and all that spaghetti looks so tasty. 

3.   CH Sounds

It's Charlie's birthday, and in honor of his birthday, the restaurant only serves items that begin with the "CH" sound. Mr. Johnson ends up ordering a cheeseburger with chocolate ice cream, and this time Grover gets his order right and brought in right away, but before Mr. Johnson can enjoy his meal, the table gets taken away, as table does not begin with "CH." One neat thing about this segment is it's perhaps the only one where the outside of the restaurant is shown. 

2.   Rival Waiter 

Mr. Johnson actually gets a different waiter, Pino, but then Grover shows up and they argue over who is supposed to serve at Mr. Johnson's table. Mr. Johnson actually doesn't care who his waiter is, and they cooperate to bring in food, bringing in nearly everything until Mr. Johnson has them listen to what he wants. Unfortunately, the restaurant happens to be out of what he wants. He probably should have just picked some of the many food items that had been brought to the table. 

1.   Big Burger

One of the all-time classic waiter Grover segments, Mr. Johnson orders a hamburger, and he gets two choices: The little hamburger and the big hamburger. Since the little hamburger is too small, he chooses the big one, refusing to listen to Grover's warning about the big one. And a giant hamburger crashes through the door and onto the table. The giant hamburger makes this one the most hilarious of the waiter Grover segments.

Well, that's my list. Now if you excuse me, I have to go out to eat (hopefully no blue monsters will be serving me).

The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, muppetmindset@gmail.com

The Great Muppet Survey - BJ Wanlund

Answers from BJ Wanlund

1.  Who are your three favorite characters from The Muppet Show, Muppets Tonight, The Jim Henson Hour, the Muppet movies, etc. and why?

That's like asking me to choose a favorite child! I love them all, but my three very favorites are Gonzo (which will figure into another answer later on), Beaker (mainly because he's one of the funniest Muppet of the entire crew) and (in a bizarre twist) Uncle Deadly (mainly because when he was on he was absolutely hysterical).

2.  Who are your three favorite characters from Sesame Street and why?

This one is WAY easier.  Grover, Ernie, and Bert. Grover is what I feel is what Elmo SHOULD have been: A monster that was overly cute, but not overtly so. Ernie and Bert, along with Grover, have been my favorites since I was a child, and since I have Asperger syndrome, a higher-functioning form of autism, it actually makes sense that these three have been my favorites for the longest time. So yeah, when Grover took over the @sesamestreet Twitter for "The Monster At The End of This Twitter Conversation," I was absolutely in Grover fan heaven along with the rest of the Internet.

3.  Who are your three favorite characters from Fraggle Rock and why?

Gobo, Wembley, and Red. And I'm NOT just saying this to please a certain Chris Hardwick and his friend Karen Prell (I'm jealous the two of you are friends, BTW), but I think Gobo was the most sane one of the Fab Five, Wembley was the excitable one, and Red was the tomboyish one. But the interactions these three had along with the other members of the Fab Five were priceless and made the show that much more memorable.

4.  What is your favorite television program starring any of Jim Henson's creations (e.g. The Muppet Show,Sesame Street, Fraggle Rock, Dinosaurs, etc.) and why?

Jim Henson's Muppet Babies. I watched this show when I was very, very small, and I remember my father taping episodes of this off of CBS for me (and I would love nothing more than those old commercials to be restored along with the rest of the show onto Blu-Ray or digital download as a result). This show was, and still is, the most imaginative, creatively made show on television. Absolutely NO show, before or since, has even come close to matching this show's creativity, imagination, and inspiration. Plus, this is why I love Gonzo. Baby Gonzo, voiced by Russi Taylor, was, and is, the very best thing about that show. From the various situations poor Baby Gonzo put himself into to the great parody elements that brought on, this show has truly withstood the test of time like no other cartoon from those days. Of course, I'd love it if Disney finally put this amazing show onto DVD, Blu-Ray, and/or digital download, but I am very biased towards this show, and it has a special place like no others in my Muppet fan heart.

5.  What is your favorite Muppet movie and why?

Too easy: The Muppet Christmas Carol. Paul Williams's effortless songwriting, the heart shown by all the characters, including Beaker and Kermit, and the best part of all: Michael Caine's definition to my mind of how the role of Ebenezer Scrooge is SUPPOSED to be played. Michael Caine played this role like I believe everyone should play this role: With a ton of heart, but with a twinge of evil until the very end. Not even the movie that came after (Muppet Treasure Island) came even remotely close to this one in terms of heart, humor, etc.

6.  What is your favorite Muppet/Sesame/Fraggle song and why?

As far as the Muppet song specifically, I'm going to give you one of my personal favorites of just Muppets performing, and that is "Rainbow Connection." I have a very special emotional connection with that song in that the version performed at the end of The Muppet Movie was quoted in my high school yearbook from senior year in the section that was dedicated to "senior ads." I still get teary-eyed thinking about how sweet my mom was to do that for me.

Of course, I have to do at least one Muppet Babies song. Obviously. My very favorite song from Muppet Babies is "The Future Is Counting On You" from Muppet Babies: The Next Generation.  Second favorite is "Guiding Star" from Where No Muppet Has Gone Before.

7.  If you could have dinner with any living Muppet performer who would you choose and why?

I think I'd like to have dinner with Dave Goelz, just because he's awesome.

8.  If you could tell Jim Henson one thing, what would it be?

Thank you. Thank you for giving me and so many others the kind of pure joy that would have been impossible to experience otherwise.

9.  If the President called you and asked to discuss Muppet projects, what would you tell him was the "Greatest Muppet Moment of All Time"?

Yikes, that's tough.  I think I'll go with when Kermit is sitting on the log in The Muppet Movie, just Kermit and his banjo, and singing about rainbows, what's on the other side, and all of that.

10.  What's the name of that song?

"La-dee-dah-dee-dum…" (because why not?)

11.  If a judge ruled that Grover had to be your personal assistant for a month, what jobs would you have him do?

Just being Grover. And being a motivator. That'd be the only things I'd make him do.

12.  In your opinion, what is the worst Muppet production ever made?

Easy: The Muppets' Wizard of Oz. Not only did this total misfire of a production have the unfortunate distinction of being the first Muppets project under the Disney umbrella, this was just the WORST thing ever. And it wasn't just Ashanti that made this movie totally awful, either. The part of the Scarecrow was woefully miscast as Kermit, the Cowardly Lion sounded way too much like Bert to be even remotely believable as Fozzie, and the songs were worse than Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones.

13.  Who is one celebrity you would love to see cameo in the next Muppet movie?

I am going to cheat here and have two, but it'll make sense: Carol Burnett and Vicki Lawrence. Carol because she needs to redeem just how bad her Muppet Show episode was (sorry Carol, that didn't showcase your many talents at all) and Vicki so that they can bring the "Hannah Montana" crowd in to see the movie. Because I felt that there were too many bad cameos in the last Muppets movie.

14.  If you could take a picture with any Muppet, who would you choose and how would you pose?

Gonzo, and I'd pose with just plain old jazz hands, because why not.

15.  What is your favorite piece of Muppet merchandise that you own? (Feel free to include a picture!)

I do not have a picture handy at the moment, but I am proud to own no less than 3 Muppet Babies McDonalds VHS tapes (Daily Muppet, Snow White and the Seven Muppets, and The Great Muppet Cartoon Show), along with every single Muppet Babies VHS tape Disney released under the Jim Henson Video line, including Time to Play (with the episodes Muppet Babies: The Next Generation and Beauty and the Schnoz), Explore With Us (with the episodes The New Adventures of Kermo Polo and Transcontinental Whoo-Whoo), Let's Build (with the episodes Six to Eight Weeks and Eight Flags Over The Nursery), and Be My Valentine (with the episode My Muppet Valentine, my favorite MB episode ever).

BJ Wanlund has been a Muppets fan all his life, and is eagerly awaiting the glorious day when Disney stops being jerks about Jim Henson's Muppet Babies on current home video formats.

The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, muppetmindset@gmail.com